When Employees Break our Hearts…
As a former CEO / Founder, I experienced heartbreak all the time. My co-founder did too. Today, my clients feel the same. And I know that we’re not alone in this feeling.
Our employees break our hearts.
Because one of the most difficult parts of being a leader is the overwhelming sense of responsibility that we feel for those who work for us.
We want our companies to be MORE THAN just a source of income for them and their families.
We want our companies to be a place of opportunity for tremendous learning, a place where they gain invaluable experience, a place where they are excited and proud to work.
And we hope that our businesses can continue to grow so that they can continue to grow with it.
It often gets harder as our headcount grows. Because along with our families, friends, and investors, employees become another group of people that we fight for and refuse to let down.
So our hearts break break when they tell us that:
They have received a new job offer.
They have decided to move onto something new.
They are unhappy with their current situation.
They want more than what they are getting.
They don’t show up at team events.
And so on…
It’s hard not to take it all personally. We feel frustrated, disappointed, rejected, and maybe even angry.
But here’s the thing we can also remember. It’s okay for us to feel that way. That means we care, even if neither we nor our companies are perfect.
And we can also remember that our responsibility is NOT to make everyone happy all the time or to fulfill every desire that they have from one day to the next. That’s an impossible task and an enormous burden to carry.
But it IS our responsibility is to always put effort into answering questions like these:
Am I giving my employees permission to show up and express their biggest hopes AND biggest concerns?
Am I setting high standards AND fully supporting them to meet those standards regularly?
Am I helping them grow in such a way that if they decide to leave, they are leaving as a more consummate professional AND human being?
At the end of the day, that’s the best we can do.
Reflection Questions:
How do I feel about my current employees?
When have I or do I feel hurt or disappointed by them?
What do these feelings suggest about my identity or values?
Where might I be trying to take responsibility for things that are outside of my control?